An open letter to my Dad...

I was sitting pondering what, out of the hundreds of possible topics running through my head, I could write about tonight.

Actually, no, that's a big fat fib. I was at a total loss...again.

But then, tadaaaaaa, FB to the rescue. I saw someone post a meme about thinking of someone, and someone else had commented that she was writing a book about her mum who, by the sound of her was one amazing person having raised nine kids, in poverty, by herself. Worthy of a book, for sure.

So that gave me the idea. Not a book, but an open letter to my father. Short, punchy, to the point, from the heart. Here goes... I hope it's worthy of him.

Dear Dad,

How the hell are you? Last time I saw you, you looked at peace. I hope that's still the case.

I know you're keeping tabs on everyone down here, watching over us all as you always did while you were physically with us. Thank you from all of us.

There are some things you couldn't know though. Things that are in my head. Things I either never said, or have come to mind since you were taken from us.

Would I change anything that happened between us, or was said? No, I don't believe I would. They were supposed to happen, so did.

I have only good memories of time I spent with you, either on a golf course, playing snooker and drinking beer in a club somewhere, deep sea fishing all those years ago in Stanger, fly fishing on a cold lake in the Drakensberg (the only time we went fly fishing together), arriving back at the house with you on the back of my Marauder only to have you burn your leg on the exhaust pipe, sitting on the verandah overlooking the Indian Ocean talking, drinking, playing Trivial Pursuit, sometimes just sitting looking for whales passing. Those are just a few. There are plenty more, but those are the ones that come immediately to mind.

There's a few other things though, things I never got the chance to thank you for. As humans, we always fail in this department and wait until the person is no longer with us before they are said. I'm no different there, I'm afraid...

So.... Thank you, in no particular order, for:

- being my dad. Nothing more needing said on that.

- teaching me to be a gentleman, to respect people and their differences to me.

- teaching me to play chess even though I ended up whipping your ass, causing you to give up playing.

- the laughter you brought to my life. Life would be dull without it.

- my taste in music. Like yourself, I have a wide taste in good (bad, according to some) tunes across all genres.

- getting mum pregnant with me. Without both of you getting it on, I wouldn't be here.

- the hidings you gave me as a kid. As painful as they were then, they ended up valuable lessons and taught me many things, like how to keep my head down when passing a hockey ball instead of lifting the ball through the neighbours window.

- teaching me a love of sports as a whole. Even though I didn't really excel at any one sport, I've enjoyed every single one that I've played or competed in.

- being there for me. Though I probably didn't confide a lot in you, I knew that if I couldn't figure it out for myself, you would be there to help. Mostly though, you let me figure out things on my own, which was a valuable lesson in itself.

- my siblings, especially my sister. Yeah, she was your favourite, but who could blame you? I don't hold a grudge on that. Well, maybe a bit... No, fuckit, I don't...kidding. She's my rock.

- teaching me to be the best person I can be. Granted, I've dropped the ball on that a "couple" of times, but I think I'm getting there, all thanks to you letting me fall down and dust myself off, learn my lessons, while waiting in the wings if ever I needed you.

- teaching me values, ethics, morality. Sadly, those are lacking in the world at large, but I learned mine from the best.

- teaching, and allowing, me to be myself, to be decisive, thoughtful, mindful, respectful, caring.

- respecting me. At least I'm sure you did. If it wasn't mutual, I would have felt it.

- loving me. Through all the challenges I presented you through the 57 years I knew you, we had our differences and hiccups, but in the back of my mind I never doubted that. I still don't. (Can't believe it's almost 6yrs since you left us already).

- the talks we had. You were one of the most intelligent people I know, with a vast knowledge in many subjects, and I enjoyed listening to your explanations of things, knowing you were still teaching me something even at my age.

I'm sure more things will come to mind in time, but these are the most important.

The only other thing to say is that I miss you, "faither".

Rest well. Love you.

Look after yourselves out there, folks...be kind to each other...